Another 4 thread changes and a mass exodus

Since my last post, I’ve had my 12th – 15th thread change, 3 days apart, and all were painless. The thread is in a place that causes little to no pain which is amazing! The last time I went in to the clinic I thought for sure I would be declared fistula free. Nope. Doc drew a pic for me and explained clearly what he’d done in the procedure, which parts have healed, where it’s sitting etc. Then gave an estimate of another 4-6 weeks and 10 thread changes. Didn’t expect that! Even though I know from experience that this is not always the case, I am mentally preparing myself for that time frame and will make the most of it.

As much as I truly love being here and will happily stay as long as is needed, I’m the last person standing from the previous generation of fistula fighters. By months end, a handful of people are returning home in good health, and the remaining handful have all recently been declared fistula free. It’s all happening at once and I am feeling a plethora of emotions!

I have developed some deeply meaningful relationships with the others, and it’s hard to fathom that I won’t be seeing them every day.

Really, you know it’s coming, you know the time you have here is temporary, but it’s a long enough time to become accustomed to life here; the routine of the clinic, the friendships formed with doc and the staff and the locals, the Bangalore mentality and way of life. Most importantly (for me), is you have time to bond with others on a level that is truly special. You initially connect with people because of the trauma and end up developing these intense friendships. You share it all, every single step of the way. They see you at your worst and then your best. You watch each other slowly come back to life and talk less of the pain. It transforms into shared exceptional experiences and adventures and a sense of freedom. You learn a lot about yourselves from each other.

You become used to having no routine and the whole day to do whatever you like outside of appointments. It’s a liberating thing, a luxury we don’t get in our respective home lives because of all the responsibilities that come with being an adult. Not many people get to have a break from daily life for such long periods of time. Sure it’s a weird ass break, and can be difficult to be away from loved ones, but it’s still a break nonetheless. You know it’s temporary and savour it. Well I am anyway.

It can be scary to think about going back to normality and my wish for everyone returning home after this is that you take the lessons you’ve learnt here and incorporate them into your life. Because we have all gained insight in ways we didn’t expect and the journey should not end when you hear the coveted words ‘you're fistula free’.














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